It's December!

In just one weekend your life can do a complete 180 degrees. Now that I am alone in the apartment, there's tons of things that are going to be done within the next few weeks before the holidays. & when I say few, I mean like three weeks. lol

• Steff has moved out. It had me on edge, but honestly as I've stated, I really just want the best for her. We served our purposes in each other's life & hopefully by living with one another she learned something as I learned more than plenty.
• We'll see what ends up happening. A beautiful apartment with so much potential & now it all is up to me to see what will come from it. Guess you'll all find out in 2013 what ended up happening.
• I'm addicted to some of Rihanna's songs on her new album. Between her, the Miguel album & an underground group of rappers that I love. You guys should definitely check out B.I.C (Bitches Is Crazy) & their "Yo Soy Widdit" video. The editing & the rawness of it all drives the crazy bitch in me wild. I warn anyone checking out know it's rated R...seriously! lol.
• I'm emotionally unavailable. Emotions just get you in a heap of trouble & with that comes trusting the person with how you feel. Clearly friends or lovers are not ones to be 100% trusted right now. So I'm just living how I need to, loving myself.
• Three feelings I want to share: excited, nervous, scared. But with the proper communication, vibes & honesty it will definitely turn into something better than before.

Hope everyone is ready for the holidays. I will take photos of my life renovations soon.

- Ahlexandria

Another good song by B.I.C:

Clearing Up 8.10

I find it interesting the amount of hits that post received. I got messaged and questioned as to why I would write that & then it dawned on me maybe my wording was incorrect.

If you've followed me for some time now, here or on Twitter, you'll know that I do not live with my Mom. I live with Steff in an apartment. People have asked for advice on how to live with someone, or how can you even live with a best friend. Simply, it comes down to rules & that was the message I was trying to state. That no matter WHO it is that you live with there has to be rules set in order to be able to live with someone. The fact that is came off offensive, eh...it's more of a research & experience based blog.

When certain messages come into play like that where they start to question what is going on in my household, it's like personal blogs can only be taken so far. I can not stress the fact that if I want to share with someone I will. When it comes to certain things, there is nothing to state than what I do here. Considering this, I think I've been an open book with my readers. I wouldn't want to not be who I am all to keep people interested. Of course some things will be more intriguing than others, but all I can do is share what I want to in that moment.

For those of you understanding the point in last Friday's post, thank you. Thank you everyone for all of your feedback & curiosity. My mission in blogging is not only be able to vent, but to share myself with all of you. Hopefully by doing so you can relate to me.

With that said - 

Enjoy your weekend everyone!

xo - Ahlexandria

"I want a roommate!"

I've been getting a lot of questions how to live with a roommate, how do I live with someone who is considered my best friend. Tons of people are considering moving out, finding a place with either their best friend, or renting a room from someone they know especially with September & college life. Let me just say no matter which you choose they are not easy.

Living on your own would seem like the simpler choice, but financially it might not be right or even some times just getting lonely. The perks of living on your own, solely you - it's your space, you only have to worry about yourself & if there's a mess it's yours & only yours. Now you would think, "Well that's the same case with roommates". Even with a friend or best friend, they can easily take advantage of it because they feel they can get over on you. Some times if you're going to live with someone, someone you don't know as well can be better to live with. So, no matter who you live with there has to be rules you agree upon prior to moving in. For example: Our rules were rotation of who takes out the trash, who washes the dishes depending on who cooks, cleaning once a week, no hair in the tub, toothpaste in the sink & splitting bills & food down the middle. The only way you can enforce these rules are by; constantly setting reminders & hope that the person/people you live with doesn't go back on what the priorities are for the home you both share, & respecting the agreement you came to with them from the beginning.

The problem a lot of times, more than most, people get too comfortable. One person can tackle more than one responsibility because the other person/people aren't holding their end of the deal. So chore charts are in place, or calenders to mark what was done. Once you see or just know your name is there all the time, then you have a choice to make. You can either reiterate the agreements, make changes, or do less of so the other person can step up. I personally just continue to do what I have to do for my home because at the end of the day it's where I live, & I benefit from it because it is me who will learn from everything. Laziness & being tired is understandable, but that constantly happening becomes an issue.

No matter what it is that you do; working, school, getting wasted - there is a responsibility that you signed yourself to,that you agreed to with someone. By not holding up your end, by slacking off all the time, by thinking someone is always going to do everything or cater to you, you are wrong. Eventually the person you live with will get fed up. There are tons of tips to living with people, great ones in fact (all websites listed below).

To anyone who is considering living with someone else, the people who keep asking me about it my word of advice is:

• Make sure there are rules set in place from the beginning.
• Make sure the rules are followed through the entire time.
• Sit down & talk about: how things are going at work, home & life.
• Keeping an open form of communication.
• Don't do more than your share especially if the other person doesn't care.
• Make sure the bills are paid on time between all parties.
• If bills aren't paid on time make sure it is made up for some how.
• Don't let anyone take advantage of you.
• Living with friends can possibly ruin your friendship.
• Some times you have to think to just do for yourself.
• Make an example & if that is not enough, leave it to them to learn.
• Set up goals for your home that you all agree upon.
• Remind your roommate/yourself of the agreements from the beginning.
• If things get hard say it.
• If you need help with things & they're too "blind" leave them a note or say so.
• Do not let anyone borrow anything without knowing it will be returned.
• If everything is divided equally, make sure it's paid at the same time.

There's probably a whole list more but these websites can definitely help.

1. Roommate Survival Guide
2. Tips & Tricks for Living With Roommates
3. Surviving Your Roommate/Surviving Yourself

Good luck!
- Ahlexandria

All of this is from experience from living with people, friends from my Mom's home (renters & friends), to staying with people, to living with a person I was with, to my apartment now.